Dear Dr. Map: What are some of the world’s longest place names?
A: Humankind seems to have a strange penchant for giving a few places long, unmemorable and unpronounceable names. Only four places make the major leagues of toponymous cartographic monsters, a title Dr. Map reserves for one-word place names with more than 40 letters. First by a mile, with a stupendous 85 letters and full accreditation by the Guinness Book of World Records is Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateaturipukakapikimaungahor onukupokaiwhenuakitanatahu. This is a Māori name for a hill on North Island, New Zealand. It translates to: “The summit where Tamatea, the man with the big knees, the climber of mountains, the land-swallower who traveled about, played his nose flute to his loved one.”
This same man with big knees may have come from Wales. Coming in second, at 58 letters, is the town in Anglesey, Wales (UK) called Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch. This translates to “Saint Mary’s Church in a hollow of white hazel near the swirling whirlpool of the church of Saint Tysilio with a red cave.” Quite memorable and famous for its train station sign (see picture). Given these names, there has to be at least one fish story and it comes from a lake in Massachusetts, USA. In the Nipmuc language, Chargoggagoggmanchauggagoggchaubunagungamaugg has 45 letters, and means “Fishing Place at the Boundaries — Neutral Meeting Grounds.” And again, hunting (and exaggeration) come into play with the 44 letter Tweebuffelsmeteenskootmorsdoodgeskietfontein. This is from Afrikans in South Africa, and means “The spring where two buffaloes were cleanly killed with a single shot.” Suitably, there is a dispute whether the name is of a farm or a town, and whether the place itself actually exists. Compared to these, all other place names seem simple. I’ll take Nowhere, OK anyday.
Dear Dr. Map: What is the world’s shortest place name?
A: Yes, just an A is my answer! But seriously, just as people seem to love those long names, so too there are the opposites. Of course diacritics can make a single letter more complex, so A needs some markup. The only pure one letter names are D, E, O, U and Y. If this sounds like the caterpillar in Alice in Wonderland, ponder the following:
- Å, a village in Andøy municipality, Nordland, Norway
- Å, a village in Moskenes municipality, Nordland, Norway
- Å, a village in Meldal municipality, Sør-Trøndelag, Norway
- Å, a village in Åfjord municipality, Sør-Trøndelag, Norway
- Å, a village in Ibestad municipality, Troms, Norway
- Å, a village in Lavangen municipality, Troms, Norway
- Å, a village in Tranøy municipality, Troms, Norway
- Å, a place in Funen, Denmark
- Å, a village in Norrköping municipality, Östergötland, Sweden
- D, a river in Oregon, United States
- Ά, an ecologic hippie community in Buenos Aires, Argentina
- E, a mountain in Hokkaidō, Japan
- E, a river in the Highlands of Scotland
- O, several farms in Norway
- Ô, a castle near Mortrée, France
- O, a river in Devon, England
- Ö, a village in Sweden. Ö is Swedish for “island”
- Ø, a hill in Jutland, Denmark. Ø is Danish for “island”
- U, a place in Panama
- Y, a settlement in Alaska, United States
- Y, a commune in the department of Somme, France
Those crazy Scandinavians seem to account for more than their fair share, with Troms being quite a highlight. I’d hate to be a postmaster in Norway, with seven Ås to choose among. And let’s hear it for D, Oregon, the only non-vowel (counting Y as a vowel).
Dr. Map is off on vacation in a couple of weeks. Keep those cartotrivial questions streaming in to askdrmap@cox.net. See you in the Fall.
Editor’s humor spot:
On a beautiful summer’s day, two American tourists were driving through Wales…
At Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch, they stopped for lunch, and one of the tourists asked the waitress, “Before we order, I wonder if you could settle an argument for us? Can you pronounce where we are, very, very, very slowly?”
The girl leaned over and said, “Burrr-Gurrr-King.”
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